i'm a devout non-smoker and my boyfriend ain't. our interest clashes but not too serious. however, it came to a day he wanted me to help solemnise him to be what i am. so very well, i helped.
we kept all our deals and agreements light-hearted. i didn't want to create unnecessary pressure that might backfire. so he did manage to cut down a lot. we're talking about ten-over sticks a day to about ten-over sticks a week. but our agreement is all about quiting and not cutting down. of course, we have to start somewhere isn't it? and i must say, his improvement is tremendous! this i have got to admit.
right now, he couldnt get rid of the "few sticks" a day. he is apologetic but he couldnt say he's sorry about what he has done. because, he knew he's not able to let go. so what am i s'pose to do right now?
i'm utterly disappointed. what disappoints me more is initially, i did not even push him to quit. he was the one who request to help him and as a girlfriend and concerned about his health, i happily agreed.
if i am to harp on this fact, it'll definitely make me more miserable. i chose to give up. yet, i'm not able to swallow the disappointment.
teach me how to let go.... of the disappointment.
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