Money Matters...

no matter what i do, eventually i'll still come up with this topic. it's like super sad case for me lor. and it's so demoralizing, especially when i get to see other people enjoying their lives without having to account to anything else other than self.

what i claim my life to be: salted veggie life.

when i've reached the "ideal" age to work, i worked for extra income to pay for my HP bills. otherwise, i'll have no HP. on top of that, my dad won't sponsor my books, so my extra income goes to buying my texts. and then, i bought Fuji. of coz, that's part of my responsibility too. no matter how much i earn, my money is still accounted to something i don't want to pay. how i wished i still have my parents to pay for me.... the only memorable times which i could club my money away was when i first started out as a full-time working professional and i only needed to pay for my HP bills. the best part was i still had spare cash on hand at the end of every month... however, it was obviously shortlived.

maybe at that point in time, i thought of my future too soon. i didn't want to have my future family would be ANY similar to my current ordeal, where even cont'd studying is such a huge financial decision that have to reconsider options. so i ended signing up insurance and savings plan to insure myself and the future... and then slowly more and more bills turned up my way.

so, i'm not wrong when i said i grew up too fast. faster than my age should be.

i cant help having my eyes turned green with envy when i get to witness people more fortunate than me. i felt that they're a bunch of losers coz' they made me feel loserish. ha~!

life is just so unfair.... coz' i have to feel older than i should. *groan* i should meet people older than me, prolly in their late twenties to early thirties so i won't feel that bad. at least, we can talk at the same level. HA!

okay, i'm having mood swings coz' it's Red Day. and most importantly, pay increment is no difference from having no pay increment where i'm still left with meagre income. i cannot even shop when i planned to! do you know how disappointing that is?! i was so looking forward to it some more.... it's till there're so many unexpected expenses came along... so uncalled for. sigh... and i have no more spare cash to shop.... sobx!

now u know y i feel loserish to people who has to money to spend all they want. SOBX!