Till we meet again, UPS

today is the fateful day that i leave UPS. it seemed like a long wait, or some said it is so soon. as i am the one serving my notice, i am actually hoping time would past faster. ha! and yesterday, i was even running temperature due to a sore throat! luckily, i broke out of the fever by the night and was feeling much better this morning. otherwise, an MC today, and i have to come back tomorrow. Eww!

i left UPS with their love and a warm fuzzy feeling in the tummy. when i received a personal call from my director to tell me i'll be greatly missed and that i've brought him much entertainment and amusement in his life, i believe i've left my mark in this company, in UPS marketing. my lunch khakis did a scrapbook calendar for me and it was awesome! and in addition, the whole team chipped in and got for me a very nice swatch watch! and it's not even my bday yet... haha... i'll prolly regret leaving these great colleagues and bosses in time to come, but i just have to move on. and i'm glad i left in a good note.

this place is still a great place to be in, maybe hope when the time is ripe, i get to be back. it's my own wishful thinking but i hope that would come true... just one fine day....

i (dun) love UPS, and i Love my colleagues.

farewell, take care... i'm sure i'll miss you guys, real loads.

a narrow escape

i just received some insider news what would happened to the current team. as a few of us are leaving, either to other jobs or out of the company, the team is in a limped. so they need to shuffle some people across Mktg to fill in the missing gaps. some got promoted in a result, and some would be transferred. and i was told who would to take over the manager. it is not confirmed but it's highly likely now...

i havent heard any good reviews about her as a supervisor, what's more of being a manager. seriously, we really need someone who is really strong in their product knowledge in order to sit that throne. otherwise, it'll be history repeating itself for another time. i don't know how the current supervisors going to cope with that. no, they don't eye on the manager's seat, only very worried about having incompetent leaders.

so i guess this give me another reason to support my decision to leave. honestly, if i have chosen to stay and receive my promotion, i don't think i would last as well. :)

all the best to my teammates...

finally... a change

wow, i didn't realize i haven't blogged for ages. i guess it just happens, where you are pretty much caught up with your own stuff and forgotten a place where you can pen your thoughts. i never forget this site, actually. just didn't know what to write.

after hunting for greener pastures for 8 full months, my prayers are finally answered. i couldn't have been more relieved. patience have paid off, at last. i went through many emotional struggles choosing between a promotion or pursuing a passion, and i came to a conclusion that i wanted to fight for my passion. at times i almost gave up hope. no response, no favorable positions, repeated positions which i had no interest in... and i did what i could: tweaked my resume or cover letter, changing the way i write... i was even on the verge to accept a pay cut so that i could give prospective employers a reason to employ me. it was painful. i'm glad i could put all these behind me now, and look forward to the future.

like i'd shared with a few friends, i wouldn't have give a second thought or seek a second opinion if i have to stay in this company. the environment is conducive, and i like the company culture. most imptly, i am pretty comfortable. the only downside for me is i am not doing something i wanted. i very much wanted to do brand comms. i waited and waited. and after 2.5 yrs, i finally waited for an opening. however, i was not what they're looking for. i couldn't help being angry, really. after all, the company claimed they would place priority to internal candidates. only when they'd selected external candidate, i came to realize that the internal search was only "for show". honestly, i really didn't think this company's brand comms a tough job. all they had to do was to teach, but it did show me that they are not willing to. so be it.

the other position i would be interested was Product, doing mainly retail. however, the person who was currently in the job had been in the job for as long as i could remember. unless she got rotated out (which somehow didn't seem to be the case), i wouldn't stand any chance. so should i be waiting for another 2.5yrs or longer for that position? what if it didn't come and i end up doing something else, again, not what i wanted? well, i would have wasted a good 5 years of my faltering youth.

having to weigh many different options, i gathered that moving out would be the best for me. after all, the marketing functions in this company had been vastly diversified till each team would be specialized in just one area. it'll be favourable to old birds who have already explored all aspects of marketing, and not to some green horn like me who needs the experience rather than specializing it.

finally, i've found a company who is willing to take in greenies like me and give me the training i need, give me a small pay increment, and promises me a job scope which compromises of everything i am looking for (or even more), i am sold. even though i have gone through pretty arduous series of interview (which includes some presentation and report) till i am beginning to think i am not good enough, not cut out for it. but it is all worth it.

"Endurance is one of the most difficult disciplines, but it is to the one who endures that the final victory comes." - Buddha

yes, perseverance paid off. no one said it is easy but i'm glad to say i've, at last, steered my career to the path that i wanted it to grow. now, i can celebrate. i've ended a long journey of searching for what i wanted to do, wasted at least 5 years of my youth trying to make a detour, spending on what needs to get me on the "right track", and i'm glad to say, "i've did it!".

i'll be tendering tomorrow. honestly, even though i'm happy that i gotten my dream job, i feel the same sadness about leaving. after all, my bosses are great people who saw my potential and valued me as a staff. and i am working with the best team of colleagues. very cohesive, very close and bonded. they're really the best bunch of people i've met in all my years of working. i know i would missed them deeply.

sigh...

i will cont'd to embrace the future, and with caution. i will try not to have any expectations of the new environment and the new people i'll work with, and to have an open heart and mind to accept a new place, a new career - the career i've always wanted.

cheers.

will it going to be good...?

as some of you may know, i'm looking elsewhere to pursue my interest in marketing. the job i'm doing right now has nothing to do with marketing, even though it was in under the marketing umbrella. job hunt was never fun and it gets really depressing when you knew the resumes that you sent out, you didnt get any response. then you start to get angry with employers who just dont give newbies like you a chance to prove your worth, and think whether you'll get to realize your goals after all... the internal job transfer seemed to take forever and i'm getting really sick of my current job.

just when things seemed to look dull and hopeless, i finally saw a glimmer of hope. after waiting for 2yrs and 3 months, there is a position opened for Advertising. yes, i went for it.

my interview would be this coming Fri, at 2pm, with the Advertising manager. the only down side is, the person who got promoted from this position would be sitting in the interview too. she is JY. and recently, words of her bad reputation are circulating. weird that she'll be sitting in as one of the hiring managers though... unless it'll be like what my boss has speculated: this position would be reporting to her. if that would be true, i'll be quite darned.

there're alot of considerations now: the boss i'll report to in future, the position, giving up my current job prospects and opportunities that have been promised and slowly taking into place. i know one thing for sure that if it's a lateral shift, i will not take up this advertising position. with that future boss who feels threatened by people who're better than her and hence limit their chance of promotion, i would better off staying where i am right now, as i'm so close to a Supervisor position. a lateral shift would means i'm really starting all over again, starting off where i was 2 years ago, and possibly needs another 2 yrs or more to prove myself worthy for a Supervisor position. however, if it's a grade promotion, it would be worth considering....

my boss is obviously worried for me. even though she doesn't want me to leave now, but she would not stand in my way to pursue my interest. yes, it's a choice between a career and interest.

if you're in my shoe, what would you choose?

i hope he heard us said goodbye...

i have an paternal uncle who was born dumb and deaf. and from the day i knew he was this special, somehow i had my reservations. perhaps, i didn't know how to react or how to communicate with him. nobody taught me how. and he didn't communicate with me much.

based on my knowledge, i only knew he did odd-jobs for a living. he wasn't married, and pretty much dependent on his unmarried elder sisters and parents. he smoked and drink heavily.

during my teens, i somehow disliked him. perhaps i was influenced by my mother, whom wasn't always welcoming his uninvited presence. no, he didn't stay in my house, but he would popped by quite often enough to take a snooze after some heavy drinking sessions with his odd-job friends. he couldn't go home drunk as he knew he would get a lecturing or probably grounded. so he had to sleep away the alcohol. some times, he would snooze for a good 4 to 6 hours before finally heading home for dinner. and he would always borrow a couple of dollars from my mum (or me, when i got older), for his bus ride home when he was ready to leave. my mum may be irritated, but we took pity on him and gave him what he needed. there were times where my mum would cook for him as he was hungry as he spent his last dollar on his beers. i'd seen my parents communicated with him in gestures, and i caught up a few. it wasn't fantastic but it was good enough to get my message to him.

as you can see, he wasn't the aspiring special guy around who could've achieved something big for himself.

i grew up and gradually felt that he's a pitiful character. he didn't choose to be born special. finally, he ended his miseries at age 55.

it all started with a lump in his throat and he had difficulty swallowing. only to find out that the lump was cancerous. i have no idea what happened, until i met him during one of my CNY visitings to my unmarried aunties. he was confined in his room, by the window, which an oxygen tank and a clear pipe going through his nose. i nodded at him and he acknowledged in response. i thought he didn't look too bad as yet. it was barely 5 months, and he said goodbye.

it was a long day today. early this morning, we sent the coffin to the crematorium, and collected his ashes 4 hours later. then we sent it to the temple, his final resting place, residing together with my grandparents.

on our way home, my dad blurted out saying how life just ended at aged 55. and i commented that it was better for him to end his miseries. and my dad cont'd saying how amusing his younger brother was, that he refuses to go under the knife to cut out his tumour. apparently, he had very little tolerance to pain. so i guessed his siblings left him at his decision, and his life slowly slipped away. my dad also said when he got to his hospital, he has left. i can't help feeling sad about this.

my brother and i were discussing how he could've been different, despite his disabilities. yes, i agree, it was his choice to be indulging in smokes and alcohols. however, i believed his upbringing played a part of who he was today. he wasn't given a "fair chance" per se, as it was uncommon to be special at his era. naturally, he would be outcasted.

oh well, he has left for good now. even though i'm totally not close to him, he's still an uncle who watched me grew up for the past 25 years. it is somewhat a loss, a kin, even if he didn't impact my life. nevertheless, every death i've met reminded me to appreciate the life i have, and how much we should treasure the loved ones around us. my heart wrenched when i saw his coffin was pushed into the incinerator...

if his soul is watching over us, i hope he heard us saying our final goodbye.

i've made up my mind

after pondering for so long, i've came to a conclusion that i would want to seek positions which are pertaining to the real spectrum of marketing. i'll still be continuing with my current job and wouldn't quite without another job down the pipeline. i've done up my resumes and sent a few out over the past 2 weekends. honestly, my chances are slim. i don't know how long i have to wait... maybe 6 months? hope i would have at least a few interviews....

i saw a job vacancy for Pricing Analyst at NOL, the pay range looks good. i was a little drawn by it. but i guess i wouldn't blew my only chance to get back on track just yet. oh well... it's the waiting game.

at the meantime, i'll try for my MAPP (i.e. the interview for promotion) and see if i would be granted a job rotation soon. and as for the rest, i can only hope and pray.

on MC

last night i had a probing headache, and a real bad one. i hadn't have those kind of headaches for the longest time. and worse still, i had to cont'd some really unhappy conversation with Nick. not at all very helpful...

i didnt take any medicine and went to sleep, believing that it'll be alright by morning. i was slightly wrong. i woke up with a headache at the left side of my head - a migraine. seriously, i didn't know how that developed into a migraine. all i knew was it felt as if someone punched my head and it was THAT painful. i knew i had to call in sick. after that, i popped a pill and went to rest some more. surprisingly, i woke up 4 hours later, i was fine already.

so yar, i had been at home nuahing, sourcing for some jobs.....

okay, i better go sleep already. i'll take another panadol jux in case it comes back tomorrow morning. ha...

i've come to a cross junction...

i've been with the current company for 2 years, doing what i'm doing for 2 years already. i would say, i'm good at what i'm doing. and the company is a good place for their employees to grow. fellow teammates and bosses are what made our stay worthwhile. perhaps its due to our job nature, it made us gel better as we could relate to each other on the daily basis.

reality sets in. they gave me a reasonable pay increment this year, however, it's just not enough. and hence i'm forced to make a decision.... soon.

i've figured out 3 options for me:

1) to find a greener pasture, doing the same thing.

with that, i'm quite sure i would be able to request for a 30 to 40% increment. the work i'm doing right now is relatively niche and not alot of people enjoy working with numbers.


2) find a job which is related to my degree, however, pay may be stagnant.

i've completed my degree for 3 months already, and time is ticking. in fact, if it wasnt what i decided that i want to do communications related work, i wouldn't have made the decision to go back to school.

3) stay and wait for internal job transfer.

it wasn't too long after i joined this company, headcount froze for nearly 2 years. recession came in, pay froze too, and everyone grit their teeth and was grateful we still have our jobs. despite the recession, we had a small variable bonus payout and our usual AWS too. so we couldn't ask for too much.

however, times are slowly regaining back to normal. so most of us are expecting proper rewards. and i guessed most of us are pretty disappointed.

i know if i hang out long enough, i would be given an opportunity to move to other departments, ONLY when there's a headcount available. it could be created or people left. and movement may be lateral - same position, same pay, same rewards. of coz' if i pass my supervisory interview, the movement may be upwards. but that headcount in the other department may not be a supervisory headcount... hence it could either be lateral transfer or stay put in my current dept. and if i stay put in my current dept, if i get promoted, there might be a chance where i get to be posted to HK for an undefined duration. this offer used to be enticing, but with my current situation, i'm not all that keen anymore.

so how?

i know it depends whether i would view monetary rewards more than job satisfaction. but both are closely intertwined.

age is catching up and i don't have much time to play around. and i believe the next step i would take determines my lifelong career. and that's not something i want to trifle with.

i'm back!!

as most of you know, my laptop crashed. i guess the motherboard was overheated and one fine day it refuses to boot up. sigh. pretty unexpected though. and spending for a new laptop was totally unexpected as well. after all, i had other plans for that bonus.... heart pain, definitely.

life's pretty much the same, only that i think i have been really discipline on myself for the past few months: no shopping. some may protest coz' i did some shopping for CNY but that was like the most last minute thing can. the next day was the eve of CNY and i just went shopping for clothes. Nick accompanied me the whole time, running from store to store. so ya, that was the only one time after a few months of cold spell. i haven't been online to look at clothes, anything! basically, there was no retail therapy.... it's sad, really. coz' i need that once in a while to keep myself sane and happy. and i don't think i'm that happy now.... i'm constantly thinking how to clear my outstanding debts.

i have a pay increase. it's a mere 10%, good for some, but not too enough for me. still, it's extra cash and i should be happy about it. well, sort of.... it's a good bait to keep me in the same company for another 6 months or so.... actually i'm quite sick of what i'm doing. i guess it's about time that i would go pursue what i set out to do since the start of my degree, now that i'd graduated.

i'm setting out to clear my credit bills. right now, paying my own commitments and the household is taking up nearly 3/4 of net pay. it's really very heavy for me now. so every month, i don't managed to save. every last cent is accounted for. i'm so sick of it. so i've decided to take up a PT job, as a tuition teacher to earn the extra cash so i can save for rainy days. i need that money, just in case of any emergency. i may have a savings plan but i don't have intention to touch that money. what i need is Cash. and i may approach my brother for a loan.... not a small sum but i had to do it, rather than having the interest charge. now, all i have to do is ask.... but i don't know where to start. it's so embarassing....

and i've already postponed my dive trip to sipadan, and also pursuing further for diving.
if i don't clear these bills in time, i think i can forget about getting married. time frame: 2 years. that's all i'm giving myself; not to get married but to clear everything. i just want the feeling to know i'm debt-free.


i can't wait.....

A brand new year...

i've resumed work after a good 6 working days of break from x'mas. i would say the impromptu plan of the long break due to leftover leaves turned out to be the best break i ever had in all my working experience. it's nice to be waking up late, bumming around abit, and basically your mind is free from work. and just before the break was coming to an end, i began to feel a little work-sick coz it was getting boring doing nothing much the whole day. and ta-da, time to go back to work. i guessed it was rare to be actually looking forward to work again. :)

the 1st week of work for a new year wasn't too bad. of coz', there're some issues at work which sort of making things tough, but they're just work stuff. and it happened every year. so having to work for nearly 2 years with the company, i wasnt caught off-guard. in fact, getting quite used to it after understanding the whole work process (even new ones).

anyways, this year gonna be a funfilled year and a year of travelling for me. the planned (and some confirmed) events as follows:

• i'll be heading to Philippines this coming week and would be away from the 15th and back on the 19th. this would be my 1st diving trip of the year!
• in Feb, i'll be going to Tioman for Open Season Dive
• Jun/Jul is planned to go to Cambodia for some charity work.
• mid-Jul, i'll be going to Sipadan for dive trip! yippee!!
• mid-Sept, i'll be heading to Bali for dive trip! yippee!!

yes i know, this is definitely not the 1st time i'm repeating this. but this serves more like a reminder to me, so there are things to look forward to and continue to stay happy. :D

amidst of all those fun, i have only about 5 to 6 days of leave left for the year, not counting in the cambodia trip. as we still do not have the itinerary out yet, i would have to keep those leave aside for this. if the charity trip didnt come through (or i didnt managed to go as there's some possibility it may clash with my diving trip), i wouldnt mind clearing another block leave end of this year! hehehe... oh well, see how it goes!