YM is "out of my life" for 3 wholesome weekends. not that he totally detached himself from my life; we still chat on the phone for a few minutes every other day and it's like a one-sided affair thinggie where i msged him but he didnt respond. it's not really encouraging on my side coz' i don't get to hear much from him. of coz', he would still sneak a few msges telling me he's missing me and all...
i tried to keep myself occupied while he's away. by far, his bunch of friends are actually very sweet towards me: they would call me out over the weekends for movies, dins or ktv. yes, it's hefty on my wallet considering everyone's going on dutch. YM would be there to pay for my share y'know...
other than that bunch of friends, i was also in contact with mr. X, an ex-colleague from UPS. we would also be out for dinners and/or movies too. so it's another expense again...
so for these 3 weekends, my time were neatly occupied. not alot of time were spent thinking of YM, which is good and also bad. needless to go further in that... and my weekdays were working...
now that i've wrapped up my semester, leaving with just one more session of intensive lecture this weekend, i'm pretty much done with studies other than waiting for the final clearance of exams in mid-Nov. can't wait for exams to be over...
somehow, i didn't allow myself to feel lost without him by my side. even though it's temporary and for just 6 weeks, i made myself as busy as i could even though it drained me at the end of every week. however, that's how i felt could make my time past faster. then again, i may not receive total understanding from him. it's hard to explain when i'm here and he's there, and there's so much i could do to assure him. i'm suddenly lost...
right now, it's a good time for me to spend time with myself and things i enjoyed doing alone. after all, what's the possibility that i'll have such chances after i'm married? however, i've gotten too lonesome and he couldn't take it.
i can't possibly be sitting there all day and sulking upon his absence! since i have my space right now, of coz' i'm making full use of it. so i guess it irks him to know i'm enjoying myself without him while he's slogging his guts out. right... oh yeah, i understand that green-eyed feeling. but i don't deny that i'm REALLY enjoying myself to the max. perhaps it's refreshing for me to get a breather after being so sticky to YM for the past 4 years... even though it's only a short period of time, but i thought it's essential. so at least with this "breath of fresh air", i'm ready to embrace a new stage of life when he's back.
then again, he just can't see the point...
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